Revision

By mid-June 1925 Lawrence was able to send the revised version of Book VI to Garnett, commenting 'This, being the best written section, is less cut about than any yet: and has lost fewer lines: only a bare 15%: though a good many lines usually come out in the next stage (galley) and in the first page-proof which succeeds the galley.' (1) Lawrence was to elaborate on his revision of the Oxford text in Notes - 'Beginners in literature are inclined to fumble with a handful of adjectives round the outline of what they want to describe: but by 1924 I had learnt my first lessons in writing, and was often able to combine two or three of my 1921 phrases into one.' Of the final version he wrote 'It is swifter and more pungent than the Oxford text; and it would have been improved yet more if I had had leisure to carry the process of revision further.'

Notes also reiterated that the 'single canon of change' for condensing the Oxford text was 'literary' - with four exceptions, which Lawrence went on to list:

'An incident, of less than a page, was cut out because two seniors of our party thought it unpleasantly unnecessary.' This cut was made from the beginning of what became Ch LXXXV in the subscribers' edition, and concerned a homosexual encounter between an English soldier and an Arab.

'Two characters of Englishmen were modified: one into nothing, because the worm no longer seemed worth treading on: the other into plain praise, because what I had innocently written as complaint was read ambiguously by an authority well able to judge.' The 'worm' was a diplomat who boasted of his betrayal of a colleague, and thereby had earned Lawrence's most severe condemnation - he was deleted entirely from the text. The second Englishman is less readily identified - Lawrence did not shrink from expressing his opinion of colleagues, and there must have been many in 1926 who were grateful for the relatively limited readership of the subscribers' edition.

'One chapter of the Introduction was omitted. My best critic told me it was much inferior to the rest.' The unidentified 'best critic' was of course Bernard Shaw, who had urged the deletion of the original first chapter.

'Book VIII, intended as a "flat", to interpose between the comparative excitements of Book VII and the final advance on Damascus, was shortened by an abortive reconnaissance, some 10,000 words long. Several of those who read the Oxford text complained of the inordinate boredom of the "flat", and upon reflection I agreed with them that it was perhaps too successful.' Between Chs XCVII and XCVIII of the subscribers' edition, the Oxford text contains a chapter on a reconnaissance trip.

Also, as he told Graves (2), 'The names of some of the "unhistorical" people, the small fry, English, Arab and Turk', which were fictitious in his manuscript, were changed again for the printed text, rendering them 'doubly unrecognisable'. In the opening chapter of the third draft Lawrence had written 'Since the adventure some of those who worked with me have buried themselves in the shallow grave of public duty. Free use has been made of their names. Others still possess themselves, and here keep their secrecy. Sometimes one man carries various names.'

1	L 266, E Garnett, 13.VI. 25
2	Biog G, p 55, 28.VI.27

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